Sister Oaks: Turn our mirrors into windows

SALT LAKE CITY — Sister Kristen McMain Oaks, wife of Elder Dallin H. Oaks of the Quorum of the Twelve, addressed the Westminster College institute, urging students to turn their personal mirrors into windows.

"Most (people) are mirrors reflecting the moods and emotions of their time," Sister Oaks said.

She quoted Emily Dickinson's line: "The soul can split the sky in two and let the face of God shine through."

The whole purpose of our earthly education is to start looking outside of ourselves, said Sister Oaks.

"When you're in the minority, you have to stick up for what you believe; you have to know who you are," she said.

She showed a graphic of a six-pane window. In each pane was a precept from the book "Preach My Gospel" that new Mormon converts should understand before they are baptized:

1. We have a Heavenly Father who loves us

Sister Oaks recalled speaking to a group at the University of Utah with twice the number of people; she asked them, "How many of you know that Heavenly Father loves you?"

Only one hand went up.

"At your age," said Sister Oaks, "it doesn't always seem crystal clear."

She pointed out that young people need to remember that the real conflict in life is not between the rich and the poor or the slim and slimmer. "It's between good and evil."

Satan, she said, will make us think negatively — especially about ourselves. God would never do anything to debase or confuse us. In order to recognize his voice, his presence in our lives, we must do as President Boyd K. Packer of the Quorum of the Twelve says and "immunize ourselves through the scriptures."

"We can't recognize God's voice if we're not familiar with the scriptures," Sister Oaks said.

2. Jesus Christ is our Savior and Redeemer

Sister Oaks pointed out that many of us may have "broken windows" in our lives because of broken promises, delayed blessings or opportunities lost. Perhaps someone close to us passed away or someone we trusted betrayed us, creating feelings of emptiness and despair.

"You have your whole lives ahead of you," Sister Oaks reminded students. "Call on the Atonement. There's no broken window that can't be repaired through the Atonement."

Sometimes we may find ourselves wondering "Why is this class so hard for me?" or "Why am I struggling so much financially?" or "Why is my family falling apart?"

Sister Oaks explained how Elder Jeffrey R. Holland of the Twelve has said that salvation is not a cheap experience. We will have to walk something of the path Christ walked.

"We live in a very dark world full of sadness and discouragement," she said. "But you are all little beacons, and I want you to know that."

3. Joseph Smith was a prophet of God

Sister Oaks talked about being married in her mid-50s and becoming, overnight, a wife, a mother and grandmother to 29.

She had never had to cook for so many people in her life.

"I thought, 'all right, I can do this,'" she said.

Many people, Sister Oaks said, have asked her about how lonely it was to be single for so long. She pointed out how we all have tests and "when we come to understand our religion," we can pass them.

Also important is understanding truths such as Joseph Smith being called of God. She quoted Joseph saying, upon being asked who he was: "Noah came before the flood. I have come before the fire."

"When we believe something, it can be very lonely," Sister Oaks said. "I think Joseph Smith was so lonely. I think the loneliest person in this world, right now, is (LDS Church president) Thomas S. Monson. We also need to rise to the challenge of learning our religion."

4. The Book of Mormon was translated by the gift and power of God

Sister Oaks shared that Elder Oaks once said he "read the Book of Mormon this morning and I know tomorrow morning I'll get up and read it (again)."

"It's a pattern we'd all do well to follow," she said.

Sister Oaks said she used to carry a copy of the Book of Mormon with her everywhere, thinking of it as a literal shield.

"I'd think, 'I have the Book of Mormon with me, I'm safe!'"

5. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is Christ's true church on the earth

When Elder and Sister Oaks lived in the Philippines, she said the church grew there like a "big mushroom." However, she feared the people didn't have an in-depth knowledge of the gospel.

"I felt like (Elder Oaks and I) were sent there to really teach them about the church," she said.

As a convert — "the only wife of an apostle who's a convert!" she said — she had to gain a testimony of the principals that many Mormons grow up with and take for granted.

She said the biblical scripture Malachi 3:10 on tithing and the Lord opening the windows of heaven is particularly special to her. She recalled how her first bishop was frustrated with her as she struggled to write her first tithing check.

"I had written it to him!" she laughed.

But that as soon as she finished it and handed it in, she had a strong impression and knew the church was true. "For me, tithing and testimony are indelibly tied together," she said.

Sister Oaks reminded us that we have two gifts: agency and time.

"I would ask you not to get buried in technology," she said. "Don't be so preoccupied with texting that you don't hear the spirit."

She advised being judicious about time, for a person could have 60 more years, or 60 days. She shared that missionaries are now having to be taught how to make eye contact, how to lean in and nod when teaching, because they are so used to sitting in front of a screen.

"We're not baptizing many X-boxes," she said.

6. Thomas S. Monson is the living prophet of God

Sister Oaks told of a father who lost his two children in a car accident. He became depressed and despondent.

President Monson attended the funeral. As he was leaving, he took the grieving father by his shoulders and said: "Accidents happen. Let it go. Accidents happen."

The Christmas after the accident, the father and his wife went caroling. As he sang of Christ, the spirit touched him; he remembered he had an eternal family.

He and his wife went to the home of the truck driver who had crashed into them while driving drunk and sang his family carols. The truck driver wept; the young father wept. In his mind, he heard a voice whisper, "Accidents happen, let it go."

"People abuse us, mistreat us, cheat us," said Sister Oaks. Yet we need to forgive one another as well as ourselves — which was the quiet lesson President Monson sought to teach the young father.

As Sister Oaks spoke on each topic, the six panes of the window graphic revealed a portion of a painting. Put together, the image was of the Savior.

Sister Oaks said if we remember these six precepts, we will gain a powerful testimony of God.

"I love this church," she said. "And I love you. You are such brave souls."

E-mail: eschmuhl@desnews.com